Regeneration

Did you know that a
Halved twenty will make two bills
Just like a cut worm

Mid-Wash

Is it smoke or steam?
My fire alarm doesn’t care
Fun in the shower

Whining

My fire alarm
Cries crocodile tears during
My oven’s pre-heat

Receiver

I wish to be a
Radio tuned only
To your frequency

The Arena

Doors open for brunch;
I’m a gladiator who
Awaits the lions

The Gamble

Plucking the petals
He loves me, he loves me not
The flower is rigged

Billions

I’m crazy for you
It’s a good thing that I’m sane
For everyone else

Inclimate

I curse the weather
Were I at all sweet I’d melt
In all of this rain

The Queue Cop

Guy standing in line:
Keep with the flow of traffic
I will ticket you

Fine Like Wine

You’re like Pinot Noir:
You go well with everything;
Bound to break my heart

Automatic Etiquette

You do not need to
Thank the mechanical door
It’s doing its job

Sheets and Sheets

There comes a time when
Bubble wrap must go away
How much can you pop?

Crumbs

I worry about
The kind of ants a subway
Picnic will attract

The Turn of the Screwdriver

Reading instruction
Manuals ahead ruins
The surprise ending

The Customer’s Sentence

We will offer you
Bread and water while you wait
Just like in prison

Fortune Teller

Instead of tarot
He predicts with birthday cards
“Cake’s in your future”

Uncontained

Here is another
Way you can spell disaster:
C-R-U-S-H

The Cave

The inner core of
A strawberry is like a
Sparkling geode

Grouch

I’m feeling crusty
But not like a creme brulee
Crusty like pink eye

Shaker

Those who fear their food
Has been sneezed on should worry
About their pepper