Archive for the ‘Restaurant Fever’ Category


January 14, 2010

Steak cooked medium:
A thin ribbon of red like
Sunset’s final light

What a Deal!

May 2, 2009

The prix fixe menu:
Pay twenty-five dollars for
Three courses of hate

The Arena

August 31, 2008

Doors open for brunch;
I’m a gladiator who
Awaits the lions

The Customer’s Sentence

May 26, 2008

We will offer you
Bread and water while you wait
Just like in prison


November 13, 2007

Those who fear their food
Has been sneezed on should worry
About their pepperĀ 


September 20, 2007

Much like a new pair
Of shoes, new customers need
To be broken in


May 20, 2007

Perhaps the worst mint
To find in a restaurant
Is a vile varmint


May 16, 2007

I’ve been betrayed by
The Eggs Benedict Arnold
Oh, food poisoning

Raw Deal

October 31, 2006

This restaurant is
The living dead that’s going
To make a return

Run-Down Recess

October 28, 2006

I don’t feel like Hell
I feel like what Hell beat up
For its lunch money

Miracle Worker

October 6, 2006

Customer ordered
Hardboiled eggs in their shells
But without their yolks

Theft Under $5000

June 26, 2006

Is the value of
Theft calculated before
Or after the tax?

The Thoughtless Thief

June 25, 2006

Common courtesy:
Closing the fridge door after
You’re done robbing it

My Prufrock

June 24, 2006

Measure my time by
All the pens that have been lost,
Stolen, or dried up

Feed Me

June 19, 2006

Around me closed the
Patio umbrella like
A Venus flytrap


June 16, 2006

Grimly determined
To cheer up a customer:
War on grouchiness

Value Meal

June 13, 2006

After School Special:
A deep dish of debt with a
Side of aimlessness

Deep Fried Evil

June 3, 2006

The most sinister
Meal at the artists’ cafe?
Hellibut and chips


May 29, 2006

Before my morning
Coffee customers look like
Barbarian hordes

Ruling The Prep Work Domain

May 20, 2006

I am the potato Queen
The honour includes a crown
Made of curly fries